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The 5 stages of Loss.

By Guest · Nov. 12, 2017 · Life Coaching

Stairs.

It is so awesome when one of my clients share a story with me and I love how they write it up into a blog. We can really all learn from one another! There are so many valuable lessons to learn and to teach. Thank you for sharing your story or your analogy! Sometimes a message said in a simple way helps everyone get the picture. Life does not always have to be so complicated. It is time we found easier ways to try and unscramble the confusion. Got to love simplicity!


The 5 stages of loss:

Today I am using my dog that was run over due to the gate being left open as an example.

  1. Denial. This is the moment you find out that your precious animal has lost his/her life. Firstly you cannot believe it and you ask questions like "how...?" and "why...?".
  1. Bargaining. This is when you bargain with yourself, or others, to try to reason with the death. An example will be if you realise that the gate had been left open…..you try to reason and say “if only I’d closed it or checked it was closed”

  1. Anger. This is where you blame yourself, or others, for the loss of your precious animal. You tend to lash out and blame others or yourself. Maybe someone else could’ve checked the gate…or the driver could’ve driven a little slower

  1. Depression. This is self-explanatory. Your heart is very sore and empty due to the loss. Your life seems so worthless without your best friend.

  1. Acceptance. This is when you finally come to terms with your loss. This can only happen in your own time frame and when you are completely ready for it.


Humans are not computers and they will work through these stages chronologically and very much in their own time.  One day you might be very angry and the next day you go straight back to Bargaining or Denial. I try to use this example for all aspects of loss…be it an animal, a human or even financial. I try to analyse what stage I am at…then I understand why I’m feeling like I’m feeling and finally get to accept the situation and move on with my life.