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What is Love Anyway?

By LifeworX · Jan. 10, 2017 · Life Coaching

Brigette and Anita in white shirts.

Love. What is Love Anyway? It means something different to all of us. It is something we all deserve. We are privileged to feel Love. Not everyone knows when it is right there in front of them.

Relationships are at the core of most people’s happiness. There is proof of a clear link between satisfaction within a relationship and satisfaction within life. In a strong relationship, you are looking to balance these four elements optimally: emotional, mental, physical and spiritual wellbeing.

Discovering your primary love languages and learning the 5 Dynamix of love will benefit you greatly in all your various relationships. Also, remember that at the very centre of a good relationship is good communication. Communication is not a science but rather an art.

Love, I am sure you will agree, is challenging, testing, trying, etc; but really also very rewarding and incredibly fulfilling. Just think back to a time when you weren’t in love or you were searching for it. You were empty, lonely and scared of being alone for the rest of your life. You imagined yourself being alone, you felt consistently miserable and unaccomplished in the love relationship department.

You could see your friends happy and unhappy within their relationships and wondered whether you actually wanted the hassle of it all. In the end, you gave in to this thing called love and you landed up here – trying to make sense of it all.

With a little help and clarity, you will learn that love is an emotion that needs constant work and understanding.

“Love was created to eliminate loneliness, and it gives us a reason to enjoy life.”

Remember you have a responsibility to protect and guide your heart. Don’t give up and don’t get discouraged. Learning to truly love is one of the most important things you will ever do.

Love is one of the most powerful motivators. Once we allow ourselves the luxury of love, it fills voids in ourselves and our lives. Love has been known to change lives.

Here is something that love is Not – selfish! Anyone thinking they can have a long and lasting relationship while being selfish is very mistaken. It is vital to a relationship that there is devotion. This means putting your relationships needs first. So it goes without saying – “ For the sake of my relationship...”

We do, very much, live in a "self-world". Chasing the highest levels of happiness seems to be the goal of today. When you are in a serious relationship, the “self” is not always a priority. You need to have the wisdom and maturity to know that a balance between the “me” and the “us” is necessary. In fact, for a successful relationship, it is extremely important.

If you would have to explain the total opposite word of Love – what would it be?

It is important not to put your interests, desires and priorities always in front of those of your partners – all for the sake of your relationship. There needs to be a constant balance of give-and-take. It is very important that you also don’t give up every desire that keeps you an individual in your own right, but rather, once again find that compromise.

When we spend time, money and effort on something we call it a Personal Investment. You will notice how important it becomes. It is true that it is so much harder to care for something you have not invested in. It is important for your partner to know and feel that you are completely committed to them and the relationship.

Just remember back when you first fell in love - just how often did you think about your partner, the way they looked, the way they walked, talked. It was easy and made you feel warm inside. Over time, things change. You become more familiar with each other and the fire or spark seems to go.

The longer you are in a relationship, the more prepared you should be to work on what matters within your relationship. Being thoughtful is one of those things.

It is very important to understand that love is supposed to be forgiving. We are not meant to continuously be holding grudges because things and situations did not turn out the way we expected. Try to react to tough circumstances in your relationship in a loving way rather than with irritation.

If you understand that love is the deep and private tunnel to your heart you will then understand it needs constant appreciation and gratitude. Choosing to be in a relationship means, that you have taken the step to share and enjoy life with another person whom you have chosen to be with. To show your true self is so important to sustaining a meaningful and honest partnership.

Love isn’t simple in any way and it comes with rules and regulations and often boundaries that are invisible. When you find someone who you fall in love with and vice versa, that is just the very beginning.

I asked my 7-year old niece what love is and the response was both simple and beautiful. She said, “it’s a feeling”.

Wow! That sure blew me away. For most of us, it is complicated in every way. We all want what we want, yet if we realize that it is just a feeling, then we should know that love is all around us in every shape and form.

Why do we complicate it for ourselves by putting our wants and needs into someone else’s hands? Looking within ourselves is where it begins and where we should know that it comes in the purest form. Yet, we try and find someone else to love us for the things we don’t love about ourselves.

You are lucky if you have found such love, but never forget it started with you.

Love is one of those things that can lift us up to the top of everything and plummet us if it all goes wrong.

Well when it comes down to that 4 letter word, "love", do you know that there have been more poems, ceremonies, stories, lyrics and quotes written on this topic than any other? Some are truly beautiful, some sad and heart wrenching, but they are always powerful.